How To Have Safe Anal Sex - The Blonde Stories

Did you hear about the blonde that thought sex was a pain in the ass
until someone told her to turn over?

A blonde walks into a hairdresser saloon, wearing a walkman and headset, and asks for a haircut.
"But", she says to the hairdresser, "do NOT cut the headset! That's very important!"
The hairdresser finds that kind of strange, but nods and starts cutting her hair.
But he isn't really paying attention, and accidently cuts the headset cord, and the blonde collapses.
He checks her pulse, and finds she is dead. Shocked, he takes the cassette out of the walkman and puts
it into a cassette player.
A voice on the cassette says: "breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out..."

A blind man and his guide dog enter a Bar and find their way to a bar stool.
After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, you should know something.
The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I'm a 6' tall, 200lb blonde with a black belt in karate.
What's more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a weight lifter.
The lady to your right is a blonde, and she's a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, Mister.
You still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

A Blonde was sitting on a beach in Florida, attempting to strike up a conversation with the attractive gentleman reading on the blanket beside hers.
"Hello, sir," she said, "Do you like movies?"
"Yes, I do," he responded, then returned to his book.
The Blonde persisted. "Do you like gardening?"
The man again looked up from his book. "Yes, I do," he said politely before returning to his reading.
Undaunted, the Blonde asked. "Do you like pussycats?"
With that, the man dropped his book and pounced on the blonde, ravaging her as she'd never been ravaged before.
As the cloud of sand began to settle, the Blonde dragged herself to a sitting position and panted, "How did you know that was what I wanted?"
The man thought for a moment and replied, "How did you know my name was Katz?"

Two guys are moving about in a supermarket when their carts collide.
One says to the other, "I'm sorry - I was looking for my wife."
"What a coincidence, I'm looking for my wife as well, and I'm getting a little desperate."
"Well, maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?"
"She's tall, blonde, long firm legs, huge tits and a very nice tight ass.
What's your wife look like?"
"Never mind, let's look for yours!"

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