An 80-year-old Texas farmer goes to the clinic in Houston for a check-up.
The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, "How do you stay in such great physical condition?"
"I'm from Texas and in my spare time I like to hunt and fish", says the old guy, "and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight in the field plowing and mending fences and when I'm not doing that, I'm out hunting or fishing. In the evening, I have a beer and all is well."
"Well", says the doctor, "I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your father when he died?"
"Who said my father's dead?"
The doctor is amazed, "You mean you're 80 years old and your father's still alive? How old is he?"
"He's 100 years old", says the old Texas boy. "In fact he worked and hunted with me this morning. Then we went to the topless bar for a while and had some beers. That's why he's still alive. He's a Texas farmer. And he's a hunter and fisherman, too."
"Well", the doctor says, "that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than that. How about your father's father? How old was he when he died?"
"Who said my Grandpa's dead?"
Stunned, the doctor asks, "you mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather is still alive?"
"He's 118 years old", says the man.
The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, "So, I guess he went hunting with you this morning too?"
"No, Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today."
At this point the doctor is close to losing it, "Getting married!! Why would a 118 year-old guy want to get married?"
"Who said he wanted to? The bride's father came with a double-barreled shotgun. You know, us Texans don't take it too kindly if you knock-up one of our girls and then refuse responsibility."