Sex And Virginity Proverbs

Hard feeling proverbs

1. When I was born, I was given a  choice - a big pecker or a good memory....
I don't  remember what I chose.

2. Your birth certificate  is an apology letter from the condom factory.

3.  A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she  objects.

4. Impotence: nature's way of saying,  "No hard feelings..."

5. There are only two four  letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and
'stop', unless they are used together.

6.  Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the  best thing on earth.

7. There are three stages  in a man's life: Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly and Try

8. Virginity can be cured.

9. Virginity is not dignity, it's lack of  opportunity.

10. Having sex is like playing  bridge - if you don't have a good partner, you better  have a good hand.

11. I tried phone sex once,  but the holes in the dial were too small.

12.  Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the  enemy.

13. Question: What's an Australian  kiss?
    Answer: The same thing as a  French kiss, only down under.

14. A couple just  married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy  with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing.

15. Question: What are the three biggest  tragedies in a man's life?
    Answer:  Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't.

16.  Question: Why do men find it difficult to make eye  contact?
    Answer: Breasts don't  have eyes.

17. Despite the old saying, 'Don't  take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with  their wives!

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