Darsono, Wardi, Sugeng dan Jono janjian mengadakan reuni di Restoran yang ada tempat Karaokenya. Sambil makan, mereka berempat ber-bincang2 sambil bernostalgia. Setelah makan Darsono pamit meninggalkan teman2nya sebentar untuk nyanyi karaoke, "Minta lagu apa Rek? Dangdut?"
Sambil mendengarkan Darsono nyanyi, teman2nya melanjutkan obrolan mereka. "Bagaimana anak anakmu Geng?" tanya Wardi ke Sugeng.
Sugeng bercerita: "Oo, baik2 saja, anak saya kan dua. Yang cewek ikut suaminya jadi Kapolres di Medan. Sedangkan yang cowok sudah jadi boss, pabriknya dua, pabrik sepatu dan pabrik mie. Tapi ya gitu... saya yang jadi bapaknya saja ndak pernah dibelikan motor sama sekali, eeeh... pas kemarin pacarnya ulang tahun dibelikan BMW 320i gress."
"Lha kalau anakmu War?" Wardi pun bercerita, "Anakku dua kerja di Amerika, yang bonthot sekarang sudah jadi direktur developer rumah. Tapi agak gendeng juga anak saya yang bonthot ini. Rumah bapaknya sudah doyong dibiarkan aja, tapi waktu kemarin pacarnya ulang tahun di belikan rumah baru."
"Kalau kabar anakmu bagaimana Jon?" Sekarang Jono yang cerita, "Anak saya empat, cowok satu, cewek tiga. Sekarang sudah pada mandiri. Yang paling sukses ya anakku yang cowok. Sekarang jadi pialang saham. Cuman ya agak nggak bener juga. Lha... saya ini nggak pernah di kasih uang sama sekali, tapi kemarin waktu pacarnya ulang tahun di kasih deposito 100 juta."
Setelah Jono cerita, Darsono selesai karaoke, "Nyritain apa sih Rek?". "Ini lho Dar, pada nyritain anaknya, gimana anakmu Dar?" tanya Jono. Setelah nyalain rokok, Darsono mulai cerita: "Anakku cuma satu, tapi payah. Aku ingin dia jadi ABRI, eeeh malah jadi bencong. Sudah lima tahun dia buka salon, dari dulu sampek sekarang ya teteeep aja nyalon. Tapi meskipun bencong dia tetep anak ku. Apalagi dasarnya anaknya itu baik, pergaulannya luas dan sayang sama bapaknya.
Setiap dapat rejeki saya pasti diberi. Kemarin pas dia ulang tahun, ada temannya yang ngado BMW 320i gress, rumah baru, dan deposito 100 juta. Dia bilang semua itu buat bapak saja, dia tetep seneng buka salon saja, katanya.
Belajar
Suatu hari Wawan pergi ke Toko buku untuk mempelajari berbagai ilmu yang lagi ngetrend sekarang. Ketika ditanya hasilnya, ia pun menjawab :
Ya ... Saya Belajar berenang dengan menggunakan buku "Dasar-dasar renang", akhirnya memang setiap kali berenang saya selalu tenggelam di dasar kolam.
Saya belajar bahasa Prancis dengan menggunakan buku "Belajar sendiri Bahasa Prancis", akhirnya buku itu yang belajar sendirian di rak buku saya.
Saya belajar desain komputer dengan menggunakan buku "Rahasia Membuat Berbagai Efek Dengan Photoshop", akhirnya memang semua pelajarannya tetap menjadi rahasia.
Saya belajar Bahasa Inggris dengan menggunakan buku "sistem 50 jam", akhirnya memang setelah lewat 50 jam gairah belajarku hilang.
Ya ... Saya Belajar berenang dengan menggunakan buku "Dasar-dasar renang", akhirnya memang setiap kali berenang saya selalu tenggelam di dasar kolam.
Saya belajar bahasa Prancis dengan menggunakan buku "Belajar sendiri Bahasa Prancis", akhirnya buku itu yang belajar sendirian di rak buku saya.
Saya belajar desain komputer dengan menggunakan buku "Rahasia Membuat Berbagai Efek Dengan Photoshop", akhirnya memang semua pelajarannya tetap menjadi rahasia.
Saya belajar Bahasa Inggris dengan menggunakan buku "sistem 50 jam", akhirnya memang setelah lewat 50 jam gairah belajarku hilang.
New Panties
A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband.
At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs ... enough times that her husband finally asks,
"Are you wearing crotchless panties?"
"Y-e-s," she answers with a seductive smile.
"Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat."
He never heard the gunshot
At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs ... enough times that her husband finally asks,
"Are you wearing crotchless panties?"
"Y-e-s," she answers with a seductive smile.
"Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat."
He never heard the gunshot
The Face or Penis?
An American, a Japanese and a Chinese went for a hike one day.
It was very hot. They were sweating and exhausted. When they came upon a small lake, they took off all their clothes and jumped into the water, since it was fairly secluded. Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their "freedom."
As they were crossing an open area, suddenly a group of ladies from town appeared. Unable to get to their clothes in time, the American and the Japanese quickly used their hands to cover their privates. But the Chinese covered his face and the trio ran for cover.
After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on, the American and the Japanese asked the Chinese why he covered his face rather than his private part.
The Chinese replied, "I don't know about you....... but in my country, it's the face that people recognize."
It was very hot. They were sweating and exhausted. When they came upon a small lake, they took off all their clothes and jumped into the water, since it was fairly secluded. Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their "freedom."
As they were crossing an open area, suddenly a group of ladies from town appeared. Unable to get to their clothes in time, the American and the Japanese quickly used their hands to cover their privates. But the Chinese covered his face and the trio ran for cover.
After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on, the American and the Japanese asked the Chinese why he covered his face rather than his private part.
The Chinese replied, "I don't know about you....... but in my country, it's the face that people recognize."
Zinc Barrel Soup
Obama: "I want goat fried rice."
SBY (bisik2 sama ajudan-nya): "Nasi goreng kambing Kebon Sirih... Cepetan!!!"
Setelah makan Obama mengangguk tanda setuju.
Obama: "I want veal tail soup."
SBY (bisik2 sama ajudan-nya): "Sop buntut, dari Hotel Borobudur, cepetan!!!!!!!"
setelah makan Obama mengangguk tanda setuju.
Obama: "I want zinc barrel soup."
SBY kepada ajudan-nya: "Apaan tuh? Loe tau ngak?????"
Ajudan SBY: "TONGSENG Pak..."
SBY (bisik2 sama ajudan-nya): "Nasi goreng kambing Kebon Sirih... Cepetan!!!"
Setelah makan Obama mengangguk tanda setuju.
Obama: "I want veal tail soup."
SBY (bisik2 sama ajudan-nya): "Sop buntut, dari Hotel Borobudur, cepetan!!!!!!!"
setelah makan Obama mengangguk tanda setuju.
Obama: "I want zinc barrel soup."
SBY kepada ajudan-nya: "Apaan tuh? Loe tau ngak?????"
Ajudan SBY: "TONGSENG Pak..."
Barrack Obama & Megawati
Pada Jamuan makan malam bersama Presiden Yudhoyono, Obama berusaha beramahtamah dengan Megawati yang sedang mengambil Salad di meja prasmanan:
Obama: "Do You Like Salad?"
Megawati "Oh yes I do Like Shalat (Salad), even 5 times a day"
Obama "Oh that's very good, what kind of dressing do use?"
Megawati "Mukenah Of Course"
Obama : "terheran-heran dan berfikir mungkin itu dressing salad model baru.
Pada saat mengambil mie bakso Megawati berganti ingin beramahtamah dengan Obama
Megawati "Do you Like Me? (Mie)"
Obama "Oh Yes I Do Very Much"
Megawati "Then You should Try Me (Mie), still Hot You Know:) "
Obama " ... ???
Obama: "Do You Like Salad?"
Megawati "Oh yes I do Like Shalat (Salad), even 5 times a day"
Obama "Oh that's very good, what kind of dressing do use?"
Megawati "Mukenah Of Course"
Obama : "terheran-heran dan berfikir mungkin itu dressing salad model baru.
Pada saat mengambil mie bakso Megawati berganti ingin beramahtamah dengan Obama
Megawati "Do you Like Me? (Mie)"
Obama "Oh Yes I Do Very Much"
Megawati "Then You should Try Me (Mie), still Hot You Know:) "
Obama " ... ???
About Men & Women
Q: What three things are common between the sun and woman's underwear?
A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear at night.
Q: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
A: Because they are tired of using their own.
Q: What's common between men and video?
A: Both go backward...forward. ..backward. ..forward. ..backward. ...forward. ...... stop and eject
Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it doesn't come means you are fucked up.
Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction
A: A teabag.
Qualities to be a perfect wife:
Beautiful
Responsible
Energetic
Adorable
Sweet
Truthful
Self-Organized.
In short, she must have good
B.R.E.A.S.T. S
Q: What is the similarity between men and rats?
A: Both keep searching for new HOLES.
Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?
A: When the baby looks like his dad, then it is biology.When the baby looks like the neighbor, then it is Sociology.
Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having 3 meals a day as I have advised?
Lady: Doctor, I thought you had said 3 males a day.
Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, a mosquito enters the girl's skirt.Guess where it would have bitten?
The boy's hand.
Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take a bath, Tarzan removed his clothes. All the animals laughed.
Tarzan asked 'Why '?
The animals told him......... ..'Your tail is in the front'
A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear at night.
Q: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
A: Because they are tired of using their own.
Q: What's common between men and video?
A: Both go backward...forward. ..backward. ..forward. ..backward. ...forward. ...... stop and eject
Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it doesn't come means you are fucked up.
Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction
A: A teabag.
Qualities to be a perfect wife:
Beautiful
Responsible
Energetic
Adorable
Sweet
Truthful
Self-Organized.
In short, she must have good
B.R.E.A.S.T. S
Q: What is the similarity between men and rats?
A: Both keep searching for new HOLES.
Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?
A: When the baby looks like his dad, then it is biology.When the baby looks like the neighbor, then it is Sociology.
Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having 3 meals a day as I have advised?
Lady: Doctor, I thought you had said 3 males a day.
Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, a mosquito enters the girl's skirt.Guess where it would have bitten?
The boy's hand.
Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take a bath, Tarzan removed his clothes. All the animals laughed.
Tarzan asked 'Why '?
The animals told him......... ..'Your tail is in the front'
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