A Chinese man walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to China on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Chinese man hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank.. He produces the title and everything checks out.
The Loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the Chinese for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Chinese returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, 'Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire. What puzzles us is why you would bother to borrow $5,000? The Chinese replies: 'Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there safely when I return.'
Never laugh at a Chinese!
Konflik Polri vs TNI
Kejadian di depan Mall yogyakarta, danki Brimob berpangkat AKP berkelahi dengan Mayor CPM.
Keduanya berpakaian dinas lengkap terlibat adu mulut kemudian memanas sehingga masing-masing mencabut senjata.
Tetapi sebelum terjadi tembak menembak, Satpam Mall keluar dan dengan berani mengambil tindakan, demi menyelamatkan pengunjung Mall dari peluru nyasar.
Satpam tersebut melerai oknum TNI Polri tersebut tetapi mereka tetap memanas akhirnya Satpam tersebut tidak bisa menahan emosi dan menampar kedua oknum TNI Polri tersebut.
Setelah tindakan Satpam tersebut, akhirnya kedua oknum TNI dan Polri tersebut menyimpan senjatanya.
Wartawan yang berada di tempat kejadian langsung mewawancarai Satpam dan menanyakan keberaniannya menampar anggota TNI dan Polri yang berpangkat perwira.
Dengan ..datar satpam menjawab: "Mereka berdua anak saya. Dari kecil... kalo nggak ditampar nggak berhenti berantem
Keduanya berpakaian dinas lengkap terlibat adu mulut kemudian memanas sehingga masing-masing mencabut senjata.
Tetapi sebelum terjadi tembak menembak, Satpam Mall keluar dan dengan berani mengambil tindakan, demi menyelamatkan pengunjung Mall dari peluru nyasar.
Satpam tersebut melerai oknum TNI Polri tersebut tetapi mereka tetap memanas akhirnya Satpam tersebut tidak bisa menahan emosi dan menampar kedua oknum TNI Polri tersebut.
Setelah tindakan Satpam tersebut, akhirnya kedua oknum TNI dan Polri tersebut menyimpan senjatanya.
Wartawan yang berada di tempat kejadian langsung mewawancarai Satpam dan menanyakan keberaniannya menampar anggota TNI dan Polri yang berpangkat perwira.
Dengan ..datar satpam menjawab: "Mereka berdua anak saya. Dari kecil... kalo nggak ditampar nggak berhenti berantem
Girlfriends
A group of 15 year old girlfriends discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they only had $6.00 between them and Jimmy Johnson, that cute boy in Social Studies, lives on that street and they might see him and they can ride their bikes there.
10 years later, the group of 25 year old girlfriends discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap, they had free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover and there were lots of cute guys.
10 years later, at 35 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the cosmos were good, it was right near the gym and if they go late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.
10 years later, at 45 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were big, and the waiters there had tight pants and nice buns.
10 years later, at 55 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food there was reasonable, the wine list was good, they had windows that open in case of a hot flash, and fish is good for your cholesterol.
10 years later, at 65 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because lighting was good and they have an early bird special.
10 years later, at 75 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because food was not too spicy, the restaurant was handicapped accessible and they even had an elevator!
10 years later, at 85 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.
10 years later, the group of 25 year old girlfriends discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap, they had free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover and there were lots of cute guys.
10 years later, at 35 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the cosmos were good, it was right near the gym and if they go late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.
10 years later, at 45 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally, it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were big, and the waiters there had tight pants and nice buns.
10 years later, at 55 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food there was reasonable, the wine list was good, they had windows that open in case of a hot flash, and fish is good for your cholesterol.
10 years later, at 65 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because lighting was good and they have an early bird special.
10 years later, at 75 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because food was not too spicy, the restaurant was handicapped accessible and they even had an elevator!
10 years later, at 85 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.
Best vehicle to Ride
Women are the best vehicles in the world because:
- 2 beautiful headlights in front,
- 2 great bumpers at the back,
- Self-lubricating when hot,
- Finger touch ignition,
- Automatic engine oil change every month,
- Any type of pistons fit,
- Multiple seating styles & adjustments,
- Great accessories,
- Highest mileage: 9 months in just 5 mL!
That's why MEN are dying to get a ride!!
- 2 beautiful headlights in front,
- 2 great bumpers at the back,
- Self-lubricating when hot,
- Finger touch ignition,
- Automatic engine oil change every month,
- Any type of pistons fit,
- Multiple seating styles & adjustments,
- Great accessories,
- Highest mileage: 9 months in just 5 mL!
That's why MEN are dying to get a ride!!
9/11 attack
Now We Know Why He Was a General...
In an interview, General Norman Schwarzkopf was asked if he thought there was room for forgiveness toward the people who have harbored and abetted the terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 attacks on America. His answer was classic Schwarzkopf.
The General said, "I believe that forgiving them is God's function. Our job is to arrange the meeting."
In an interview, General Norman Schwarzkopf was asked if he thought there was room for forgiveness toward the people who have harbored and abetted the terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 attacks on America. His answer was classic Schwarzkopf.
The General said, "I believe that forgiving them is God's function. Our job is to arrange the meeting."
Storeroom
Agus sedang melancong ke Singapore, suatu hari dia lewat ke Little India.
Di ujung jalan dia lihat seorang india yg sedang duduk sambil elus2 kumisnya yg lumayan panjang
Merasa baru sekali ini dia melihat kumis yg panjang dan terawat, dia tertarik untuk mendekat.
"Sir, this is the first time I ever saw a person with a very long and neat moustache. May I touch it?"
"Oh sure...sure. ." (sambil geleng2 kepala)
Timbul ide untuk membeli satu rambut dari kumis India ini sebagai suvenir.
"With your permission, may I buy one hair of your moustache for a souvenir?"
"Oh sure..sure Sir. For $5 you can get it."
Ah, murah amat..dia piara tuh kumis aja udah berapa tahun..
Akhirnya Agus keluarkan $5 buat si India.
Kemudian sejenak si india berdiri...sambil ngendorin celananya dia masukkan tangan ke dalam celana dalamnya... tuing... dicabutnya satu bulu dan diberikan ke Agus.
Melihat hal ini Agus kaget...
"What? I mean I want to buy one hair from your moustache! not from down there!"
Si India dengan tenang menjawab "Sir... top is showroom... below is store room"
Di ujung jalan dia lihat seorang india yg sedang duduk sambil elus2 kumisnya yg lumayan panjang
Merasa baru sekali ini dia melihat kumis yg panjang dan terawat, dia tertarik untuk mendekat.
"Sir, this is the first time I ever saw a person with a very long and neat moustache. May I touch it?"
"Oh sure...sure. ." (sambil geleng2 kepala)
Timbul ide untuk membeli satu rambut dari kumis India ini sebagai suvenir.
"With your permission, may I buy one hair of your moustache for a souvenir?"
"Oh sure..sure Sir. For $5 you can get it."
Ah, murah amat..dia piara tuh kumis aja udah berapa tahun..
Akhirnya Agus keluarkan $5 buat si India.
Kemudian sejenak si india berdiri...sambil ngendorin celananya dia masukkan tangan ke dalam celana dalamnya... tuing... dicabutnya satu bulu dan diberikan ke Agus.
Melihat hal ini Agus kaget...
"What? I mean I want to buy one hair from your moustache! not from down there!"
Si India dengan tenang menjawab "Sir... top is showroom... below is store room"
25 cents
American Football FINALLY makes sense....
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.
'Oh, I really liked it,' she replied, 'especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.'
Dumbfounded, her date asked, 'What do you mean?'
'Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback! ' I'm like....Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!!!! !!!!
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.
'Oh, I really liked it,' she replied, 'especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.'
Dumbfounded, her date asked, 'What do you mean?'
'Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback! ' I'm like....Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!!!! !!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
